"WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO COME?"

— by D.W. February 7, 2002

Recently, at a prayer meeting of people who have real hearts for unity, brokenness and revival in this region, the Lord burned a question into my heart, which made me really start to examine my own heart and my motives for crying out for revival.

We had just finished talking about revival and being updated on events and prayer requests, and had just entered our time of prayer. I stole off to a corner of the room and there prostrated myself on the floor before the Lord. I began to cry out to the Lord quietly for Him to visit our region in power and to do great and mighty things and return to us the things stolen from us by the enemy and so on. It was then that I heard the question. "Why Do You Want Me To Come?" I lay there quietly for a moment thinking about the question before the Lord continued:

"Do you want Me to come so I will fix all your problems? Do you want Me to come so I will heal all your diseases? Do you want Me to come so you can see a "Holy Spirit show" complete with signs and wonders? Do you want Me to come so you can take pride in knowing that you were part of the great revival in your community? Do you want Me to come so they will make a Transformations video about your community and so you can feel good about what you have done? Do you want Me to come so I will give you increased power and anointing to defeat the enemy and tear down strongholds? Do you want Me to come to do things for you and others? Or do you want Me to come just because you love Me? Why do you want Me to come?"

My heart was pierced and I began to weep. Truthfully, there is a part of my wicked flesh that wants to see God perform magic tricks for me. Yes, I want to see people to be healed and delivered in the process, but, much like the seventy-two disciples in Luke 10:17-20, I am sometimes enamored with "signs and wonders". Christ’s word to them is for me too. "I have already given you power and authority to do these things. Don’t get caught up in them. Rejoice instead that you have a secure place in heaven. Rejoice instead that I love you." Yes, I want Him to come fix my problems. Yes, I want to dream dreams, see visions and prophecy. Yes, I think it would be really neat if He visits my community in power – after all, this is my hometown and I have lived here all my life. Yes, I am sick and tired of myself and others I love getting molested by the enemy and I long for more power and anointing to really kick his butt. Yes, I want to see the sick healed, the lost saved and those in bondage set free.

Nothing wrong with these things in and of themselves, but what are my real motives for crying out to the Lord for revival. Is my desperation for Him or for these things? Yes, desperation is a component of revival. Yes, helplessness and hopelessness get the Lord’s attention. But what He really wants is just my loving glance and a little bit of my time – a little bit of me. What He really wants is to love on me and for me to love Him. What He really wants is for me to want Him – not what He can do for me. He wants me to just want Him.

Then He said to me, "Would you still want Me to come, if I did not bring all of those things with Me?" Tough question. Before you answer this question, remember He knows your heart. He knows how you really feel. He knows if you and I are really longing for Him or just the things He will bring with Him, and the things He will do for us and others. Yes, our heart say, "for your glory, Lord", but what if He said He would be glorified more without these other things? Hard to imagine He could, but you know what, He is God. The Bible says His thoughts are not our thoughts and His ways are not our ways. Read through Job 38-41 and be reminded that God is in control and only He decides how things will be done. He alone knows what "Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done" really means. The Pharisees were called "hypocrites" because they thought they knew what the coming of the Messiah would look like. Certainly, they had it all together. Certainly, they knew what "Thy kingdom come" looked like. Yet, they missed it completely.

We are no different. We run that same risk by pretending that we know God’s ways and what His kingdom looks like. However, by really loving the Lord – making that our only aim – we are certain to see Him when He comes. He is certain to be pleased with us. He is certain to hear our cries for Him – not His benefits – and come pour out those benefits on us just because He loves us and has promised them. He is certain to bring revival. His Word is clear. The deliverance, the signs and wonders, the healings will accompany Him when He comes – that is a given. So, why is it so easy for me to become too focused on these "things" and less focused on the lover of my soul? Would I choose healings, signs and wonders over just 10 minutes alone with my Lord? It pleases the Lord that we cry out for Him to move mightily in healing and restoration in our region. But I hear Him saying to me in a gentle whisper the words He spoke to the hard-working, very admirable Martha in Luke 10, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her." Mary had chosen simply to sit at the feet of the Lord. Is that good enough for me – even in my circumstances and the circumstances of those around me? Is that good enough even though my heart is calling out for the Lord to touch those who so desperately need His touch? "The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me", Jesus said to His disciples in Matthew 26:11. The Lord appreciates and honors my heart’s desire for those around me to be touched powerfully by His Spirit in revival. But Mary chose rightly – she chose to just love the Master and sit at His feet.

Right now, I am prayerfully examining my own heart to see what my motives really are. I know I love the Lord. I know I want to see Him glorified. I know I want to see revival – captives set free, souls won, people healed. But would I be as excited and cry out as hard if just a simple Shepherd, with a worn staff and a ruddy face showed up and wanted to just sit with me by the river for a while? Would that be good enough?

The last thing the Lord said to me in this encounter was, "Love Me More". I said, "How?" He said, "Love Me More." I said, "Lord, how can I possibly love You more?" He again said, "Love Me More."

Do I believe the Lord is angry and upset? Not at all – at least not about our cries for revival. Do I believe He was rebuking me or any of us? Not at all. I believe He is pleased with the tears and cries for revival. And I believe He truly is coming in power to our region very soon. I don’t believe His words to me were a threat or a warning. I believe they were just simple words of love and remembrance from an oft-forgotten, oftentimes taken-for-granted loving Heavenly Father.

I believe His conversation with me, was to me at least, a very gentle, very loving reminder not to forget my "first love". It is true, God is a jealous God. He will not allow us to have anything get between Him and us – not even the good things that accompany His coming, His benefits. For me, the bottom line is simply this – is He really enough? Is He really enough? Is He, God, really all I want and need? He wants to come in power and deliver His people – His Word says so. He loves us so much – so very much. He just wants us to love Him back. He just wants worshipers who will worship Him in spirit and truth. He just wants to know we would be joyously content if He showed up just to dance with us for an evening – without all the other stuff. After all, He’s already said He’s bringing it anyway. He just wants us to love Him more. Maybe, at least in me, He is just looking for a pure, simple, refined, devoted, loving heart He can indwell when He shows up in the power and revival I long for.

Lord, please teach me how to love You more. Please teach me how to love You without conditions – the way You so dearly love me. In Jesus Name, Amen.